Friday

Highway

We passed our time day to day, but sometimes we just lose our directions. It's like you are walking on a road that's getting narrower and in the end, you reach a junction and neither path suit your taste.

And you forgot the way you came.

Sometimes I think, maybe I walked through my life with too little care. I kept moving on. That's true. Because before I start, I thought I was going on a highway. Straight, smooth and fast. And I knew the exit I will take. I THOUGHT I know.

So I spent my time sight-seeing throughout the journey. Locking my eyes on things that caught my attention. At the same time, still going on high speed without noticing I am well past the last exit I can choose.

I am too carefree, aren't I? That's why I am stranded, and I can't even go back, because I never pay a single tiny bit of attention to which highway I took. I thought life is supposed to be well-laid in front of me, just waiting for me to leave my footsteps on. I thought I would be lucky enough not have to work through decisions and failures.

All of those 'I thought'. And I never thought of this: life is moving on the speed of light. Too fast that I'd miss chances if I'm not focus enough.

Thursday

Better Late Than Never

Better late than never. And I watched, as the train starts off in front of my eyes. And his image blurred off into the dim light of the tunnel. He's still waving, so am I.

I was late and missed the bus when I first met him at the bus stop.
I was late to class and there's only one empty space left, next to him.
I was late to the cafeteria during lunch almost everyday, but I eventually noticed, there's always a seat emptied near him.
I was late on our first outing, but he just smiled and said it's okay.
I was late......

I'm always late. It's what leads me to him. And what leads me away from him.

The train is out of view now.
He's gone and I start to manage my time better.

Because I know, there won't be another empty space left for me when I'm late.

Wednesday

Different People

There she is, pondering which is her next step. Her characteristic: always thinking, often too careful not to make a mistake. She definitely has a trait called 'Rational'.

And her always-come-first-rule: Never fall prey to your feelings. Because feelings don't last. They are just certain hormone reactions and they're not dependable.

That's quite controversial. Because not far away, there he stands, determined to have a try with what's on his mind. His merit: listen to his heart, and try hard. Doesn't matter if that means fall hard, because he's no doubt the lucky-go-happy one.

And his main concern: Don't think too much and try to make things complicated. Since things change from time to time, meaning we'll have to set things straight again soon. So why don't we just let things set into their own place instead of trying to move them around.

She has her own way of dealing with things. He has his own idea on how things would work out for him. And so do other people.

Tuesday

RAM

My ability to recognise faces is kind of similar to a computer's RAM. It's volatile, temporary and loses data when not powered. In my human case, it's more like my brain forgetting someone's image when haven't been in contact for ages.

They've said,
The one who forgets is always happier than the one who is being forgotten.

From a point of view, it's quite true. Since the one who fails to recall wouldn't know that he/she had forgotten someone important. That's right, everything goes as usual, just with a slightly disfigure memory that once in awhile, would trigger a sense of lost.

And the one who's being forgotten, would sadly become the one who's going to be waiting on their side. It's like there's an invisible boundary in front of them. No crossing over, before they're being called upon.

And they've said,
The one who's being waited is more content than those waiting.
I should be glad that I have a RAM memory. But somehow I know. I hate myself for letting you slipped by my memory, alone.

Wednesday

Coincident

We represents two axes.
Our relationship can only be linked together by a third line.
We need another straight line to show a correlation between us.
But it's hopeless.
No matter what the value of correlation stands,
We are still two different entities.
Correlation means nothing.
All relationships made up were counterfeits.
Fake, caused by causality.

I posted this awhile ago. Quite some while, when I was having a class on...... I can't remember. Was it Stats?

Theoretically, causality is where the x and y axes doesn't really shows a relationship even if it's a straight line (occasionally). Because there's a miraculous term in this world: coincident.

Coincidentally, you happen to write an essay that matches your teacher's taste and get an almost full mark.
Coincidentally, you meet a new friend on the day of his/her birthday.

Coincidence plays a huge part in lives. Because somethings don't happen if not for that fate. And it's not something you can create from scratches.

Afterall, an artificial coincidence losses its charm.
When you plan for something to happen, it's not instantaneous anymore, because you don't feel the surprise that's suppose to be there.

Saturday

Alone

It's well past the agreed time.

Look out of the window. Look. It has even started to rain. It's cold.

She gives her mobile phone another glance. No miss call, no unread message. Just the date and time that seems to remain forever. It's cold. In her heart.

She watches as people on the street run into shops for shelter, she watches as couples hold on to each other under a not-too-big-for-two umbrella and her gaze stops around the corner of the shop that sells candies, hoping to see the ones she waits.

And then there, among the crowd, she notices her under the huge rain cape, and the one behind her holding up a hand to wave, not to miss another two at the back who are both carrying a box each.

She can never forget that feeling of relief. She knows, she might be sitting alone in an empty cafe; she might be alone with a phone that will not ring; she might be doing all sorts of things alone.

But she's never lonely. Because behind all the thoughts of her troubled mind, the silhouettes of her friends will lit a light in darkness.

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